Not many people from Connecticut on these boards.......
Good~
DETROIT DRIVING RULES
1. You must learn to pronounce the city name. It's Di-troit - NOT DEE- troit. If you pronounce it DEE-Troit then we will assume you are from Toledo and here for the country Music hoe-down.
2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Detroit has its own version of traffic rules... Hold on and pray! There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Detroit. Everyone drives like that.
3. When asking for directions, all directions start with: "What do I look like - #!#*!!# Triple A?"
4. The Chamber of Commerce calls getting through rush hour traffic on Jefferson a "Scenic Drive."
5. The morning rush hour is from 6:00am to 10:00am. The evening rush hour is from 3:00pm to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. Weekends are open game.
6. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. If you're first off the starting line when the light turns green, count to five before going. This will avoid getting in the way of cross-traffic who just ran their yellow light and then, again, getting shot.
7. Schoenherr can ONLY be properly pronounced by a native of the Detroit metro area. That goes for Gratiot too. ( SHANE-er /GRASH-it).
8. Construction and renovation on I-94, I-96, I-75 and 275 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment.
9. All unexplained and unpleasant sights are simplified by the phrase, "I guess we're not in Kansas anymore!"
10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect or they are "out-of-towners."
11. All old men with blue/white hair wearing a hat have total right-of-way.
12. The minimum acceptable speed on 696 is 85 regardless of the posted speeds. Anything less is considered downright SISSY.
13. The wrought iron on windows in Detroit is NOT ornamental. "DON'T get out of your car."
14. Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says, "Keep honking, I'm reloading."
15. If you are in the left lane, and only going 70 in a 60 mph zone, people are not waving 'because they are so friendly in Detroit.' I would suggest you duck.
16. I-275/I-696 is our daily version of NASCAR.
17. You must go a quarter of a mile out of your way to make a left hand turn. If you want to turn left, go past your turn, get to the left, then make a left, then make a right. NOW you have gone left.
18. It's not 10, it's "the Lodge."
19. That's not a lake, it's a pothole. Lakes are much smaller than potholes.
20. If someone tells you it's on Outer Drive, get a map then ask a local for an alternate route! (same goes for Little Mack / Greater Mack / Kelly / Grand Blvd / Inkster / Northwestern / Adams / Squirrel and many more...)
21. And don't forget. In Detroit, Canada is to your SOUTH when you're looking across the river. When you come out of the tunnel in Windsor you're facing the river...
<font color="#cd6600" size="1">[ February 23, 2004 11:36 AM: Message edited by: pairadocs ]</font>
Not many people from Connecticut on these boards.......
Good~
Pairadocs...in Michigan we don't call it driving. We call it "aiming".
paiadocs did you come up with those rules, because each and every single one of them is 100% truth!!
I actually had a High School teacher give extra credit on a test of the correct spelling of Schoenherr. Good thing I grew up less than a block from it, I needed the extra point!
And Jor, I've discovered the difference in Detroit and Chicago drivers. In Detroit, you pick a lane and go like a bat out of hell. In Chicago you go like a bat out of hell and use EVERY lane of traffic possible. That's the reason that you notice the pot holes. We never use that area of road becuase we're too busy in our lane trying to break the sound barrier!
Oh, and you Chicagoins use your horn WAY too much. Honking like that in Detroit WILL get you shot!
<font color="#cd6600" size="1">[ February 23, 2004 11:43 AM: Message edited by: macabeee ]</font>
I've witness Jor's driving first hand. He has got East/West issues.
East/West issues?
Is that like I-94's east / west issues where West is actually South and East is, in reality North?
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">More truth, man.Originally posted by macabeee:
paiadocs did you come up with those rules, because each and every single one of them is 100% truth!!
I actually had a High School teacher give extra credit on a test of the correct spelling of Schoenherr. Good thing I grew up less than a block from it, I needed the extra point!
And Jor, I've discovered the difference in Detroit and Chicago drivers. In Detroit, you pick a lane and go like a bat out of hell. In Chicago you go like a bat out of hell and use EVERY lane of traffic possible. That's the reason that you notice the pot holes. We never use that area of road becuase we're too busy in our lane trying to break the sound barrier!
Oh, and you Chicagoins use your horn WAY too much. Honking like that in Detroit WILL get you shot!
<font color="#cd6600"><font size="1">[ February 23, 2004 11:43 AM: Message edited by: macabeee ]</font></font>
No, I didn't come up with those - I got them in an email from my sister who lives in Dearborn. It was going around her office.
And yes - it's hilarious because it is TOTALLY true! I went to Wayne State for a sememster out of high school, had to drive the Lodge every day... you snooze, you die...
I always enjoyed reading the spray-painted "Kill Whitey" slogans everywhere too...
<font color="#cd6600" size="1">[ February 23, 2004 11:58 AM: Message edited by: pairadocs ]</font>
Mrs. Baimun and I still visit relatives that live off 14 mile and on over to the lake they have their boat in....
... the majority of the time we're in Lansing, and the rest of the time we go to St. Joe, Coldwater, and Bay Harbor.
I think Michigan has some of the best golf courses in the country. [img]smile.gif[/img]
<font color="#cd6600" size="1">[ February 23, 2004 01:17 PM: Message edited by: baimun ]</font>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">WE drive like that because in chicago no one will get out of your way. I just assume people are like that everywhere. Freaked the hell outta me in IN and MI when i'd approach and someone would move over to the right lane. I'd never seen that before! [img]biggrin.gif[/img]Originally posted by macabeee:
And Jor, I've discovered the difference in Detroit and Chicago drivers. In Detroit, you pick a lane and go like a bat out of hell. In Chicago you go like a bat out of hell and use EVERY lane of traffic possible. That's the reason that you notice the pot holes. We never use that area of road becuase we're too busy in our lane trying to break the sound barrier!
Oh, and you Chicagoins use your horn WAY too much. Honking like that in Detroit WILL get you shot!
<font color="#cd6600"><font size="1">[ February 23, 2004 11:43 AM: Message edited by: macabeee ]</font></font>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">You should check out the Grand Rapids area - I think we have the most golf courses per capita than anywhere else in the country. [img]smile.gif[/img] Througout Michigan, there must be a gajillion (thats a real number I think) golf courses!Originally posted by baimun:
I think Michigan has some of the best golf courses in the country. [img]smile.gif[/img]
<font color="#cd6600"><font size="1">[ February 23, 2004 01:17 PM: Message edited by: baimun ]</font></font>
But I only play when my company is paying for it... [img]wink.gif[/img]
...that, and I suck at it. [img]wink.gif[/img]
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